Life

making hotel reservations can be complicated when your last name, like mine, is Hilton and your boyfriend's is Marriott. Before going to Hawaii for our wedding, we booked separate rooms. Delayed flights and lost luggage got us in very late. When we told the clerk our names, his eyes widened. "We gave away your rooms," he apologised. "When no-one showed up, we figured it was a joke."

people just aren't happy unless they have something to complain about. I stayed in a beautiful hotel right on the beach in California -- an idyllic spot, you would think. But while I was waiting to check out, I heard the manager ask another guest, "Did you enjoy your stay?""Not really," the man said grimly."I'm sorry to hear that," the manager apologised. "What was the problem?""The surf was

A mouse scurried across my kitchen. I set out some poison and went to bed. But I didn't realise I left a half-finished cup of yoghurt on the bench. The next morning when I went to toss it away, I noticed that tucked in the yogurt were two of the pellets I'd left for Mr Mouse. I had to smile. It was like he was saying, "You first."

priest, who was a good friend of the family, agreed to help celebrate a special Mass for my parents' 50th anniversary. While he was going over the service, he asked my mother, "Are you planning to renew your vows?""Why?" Mum asked. "Have they expired?"

decoys, fishing rods, boots -- outdoor gear of all kinds was piled high in the garage. One day I found my wife staring at the mess. "I hope I die first, so I don't have to get rid of all this," she sighed."Look on the bright side," I suggested. "If I go first, you can put an ad in the paper. When all the men come by to check out the stuff, you can pick out a replacement for me."Still staring

that I am, I constantly log on to the Internet to self-diagnose my latest ailment. But even I knew it was time to lighten up the day I typed in the key words "liver disorders." That led me to a medical site. With growing alarm, I realised I had each of the first seven symptoms. Then I came to No. 8 and suddenly felt much better: "Feeling of lethargy. No longer enjoys romping and wagg

there's a competition for Worst Waiter of the Year, I've got a candidate. He was working at my aunt's favourite restaurant when we took her there for her birthday. This guy messed up every order. She asked for pork. He brought beef. We requested beans. We got corn. And so on. At the end of the meal, he asked, "Would anyone like dessert?"My aunt said, "What do I have to order to get a piece of c

I was unable to open one of the back doors of my car from the inside. It was annoying, but not a huge inconvenience.Then, standing in the driveway one day, my son's six-year-old friend asked me, "Are you still having trouble with your door?"When I said yes, he reached over, opened the door and flicked the childproof safety switch. Next time I buy a car, I'm reading the manual.

on holiday, I picked up the local paper to check out the forecast. It read: Today: Sunny, 23.Tonight: Not so sunny, 12.

DVD player was broken and we weren't going to be able to watch the movie we'd rented. Then my husband had a brilliant idea: "Why don't we use the PlayStation?" We pushed all the buttons, but couldn't get it to work, so we gave up and went upstairs. We were reading in bed when our 17-year-old son appeared in our doorway. "Someone left a DVD in my PlayStation," he said."We were trying to watch a