Money Jokes

Witless for the defence

A young, inexperienced bank robber gets caught during his first heist and ends up in court. Crucial evidence – including security footage from the bank’s lobby – has gone missing. After weeks of... read more

Family reunion

A man in Scotland calls his son in London the day before Christmas Eve and says, “I hate to ruin your day but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is... read more

Savvy salesman

An old man at the end of a jetty is selling seagulls – $2.50 for one, or three for five bucks. A curious tourist goes up to him and says, “I’ll take one, please,” and hands over his money.
... read more

Cyber dick

I enrolled in an online school to become a private investigator. I gave them my money, and then I never heard back from them. I thought: Either I just got ripped off, or this is my first case.

Youth versus experience

A fit young man on a construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. After several minutes, one of the older workmen had had enough.
“Why don't you put... read more