Time Travels in Just One Direction

Last year, my wife and I celebrated the birth of our first child, a healthy and precious baby boy. We named him Daniel JuEun, which means God’s grace in Korean. Going through the nine months of pregnancy, enduring the long eight hours of labour and being there in the delivery room as he came out into the world were incredible, emotional and life-changing experiences for both of us.

Daniel, at a few months old, is now in full control of our lives. We willingly spend all our money on his clothes, toys, CDs and what feels like an infinite number of baby care products. We sleep only when he allows us, we feed him whenever he demands, and we eagerly serve as his diaper changers. He gets a special kick out of peeing into the air while we put on his new diaper. In the coming months, when he doubles his age, I fully expect his urinary projectile to reach our faces.

In the midst of it all, we are absolutely enjoying and loving every minute of being new parents. Sometimes, when we are lucky, our angelic, infant son endears us with his irresistible smile and perhaps even a blabbering sound. Our hearts melt whenever this happens. We also clap with pure joy when he yawns or raises his faint eyebrows. There is just as much exuberance in our house when he burps.

Indeed, these are precious moments and days – once gone, they will never return.

One of my hard-learned life lessons is that time travels in only one direction. We will never get a chance to relive this very moment. We have all been given the wonderful and miraculous gift of life, but our time on this earth has a definite expiration date. It is crucial that we spend this one-way gift wisely. I reflect on this simple truth whenever I face a major decision or when I need to reprioritise my life.

My own belief was put to the test when I received a call from an executive recruiting agency. The recruiter asked for my interest level for a C-level position at a relatively large, publicly traded US company. It sounded like a great, “once in a lifetime”, as he described it, opportunity. The company was well known and highly regarded within the industry, the compensation was significantly more than what I was making, and the position also came with several executive perks, most notably a generous stock option.

All in all, this new position’s monetary value was nearly twice what I was currently receiving. It was very, very tempting.

The recruiter continued to inform me that the role had global responsibilities, which required approximately 80 to 85 percent travel. Basically, the job required visiting various regional and branch locations across several continents and returning home for less than one week a month.

Towards the end of our phone conversation, the persistent recruiter requested that I update and e-mail him my resume. I thanked him for the potential opportunity, but I informed him that my current work already required almost 50 percent time away from home, and that was the maximum limit I was willing to take. This comment surprised the recruiter. He had touted the fast-paced, jetting-setting lifestyle as yet another major selling point.

A few days after our initial discussion, the recruiter called me back on a late Saturday morning. As it happens, my wife and I were quite occupied getting a major booger out of Daniel’s nose in the midst of his screaming protest. The recruiter had spoken with the company on my behalf. He happily and proudly reported that the travel would significantly drop below 50 percent once a major corporate initiative, which I would lead, was complete in a couple of years. I thanked him again for his kindness and the consideration. I also firmly informed him no compromise will be made for time at home for the next several years.

As I hung up the phone, when my wife asked who it was, I simply replied, “tempting distraction, but no match for our JuEun (God’s grace).” Time travels in only one direction. We decide how to spend it. Choose well.

J.H. Hyun is the author of the book Outswimming the Sharks. He is a 20-year veteran of Fortune 500 companies, leading to his most recent role as vice president of global business processes at a multibillion-dollar European firm.