Becoming stressed – or strengthened – by disability
Having a brother or sister with special needs can create lots of challenges. “Siblings of children with disabilities are at a greater risk than average of developing emotional issues, anxiety and stress,” Avidan Milevsky, PhD, wrote in Psychology Today. He explained that these siblings may be neglected by overburdened mums and dads, take on parent-like responsibilities, and grapple with emotions from guilt and embarrassment to fear and jealousy. But it’s also possible that having a sibling with a disability could create opportunities later in life. “These siblings often develop certain positive characteristics such as self-control, cooperation, empathy, tolerance, altruism, maturity and responsibility as a result of dealing with their family situation,” Milevsky wrote. “In some cases, these siblings use someone’s attitude about special needs as a test for screening friends and mates. Their involvement with their sibling may even lead them to choose future occupations in the helping professions.”
Providing later-life support
As siblings grow they often form other key relationships with spouses and their own children. But later in life those newer connections can end or change. “A lot of people are going to wind up in senior adulthood without a husband or wife, their kids have scattered to other cities, and the only people left at the dance will be the ones what brung them, which is their brothers and sisters,” Jeffrey Kluger, a TIME magazine editor at large and author of The Sibling Effect: What the Bonds Among Brothers and Sisters Reveal About Us told NPR’s Science Friday. This is the time to take advantage of healthy sibling relationships and retrieve ones that may have been lost. “The argument I make, particularly when it comes to taking care of ageing parents, is if you can fix [a sibling relationship], do,” Kluger said. “Your sibs are just such a resource.”
Enjoy these inspiring quotes about family that truly hit home.
The absence of siblings
While there may be some stereotypes that say an “only child” is selfish and can’t get along with others, the experts say not to worry. “There is a small amount of research on only children, and for the most part those kids grow to be well adjusted,” says Howe. “Only children often develop close connections with cousins or friends instead.” Kramer agrees. “When it comes to developing social skills, it’s not like you’re doomed for life if you’re an only child,” she says. “Children find other relationships in their lives to develop those competencies.”
Learn 11 ways to make your kids more emotionally resilient.
Sign up here to get Reader’s Digest’s favourite stories delivered straight to your inbox.
Source: RD.com
