You’re not a mindreader so stop acting like one
“I am a grandmother of three and if I could give my grandchildren one piece of advice for their marriages, it would be to never assume your partner knows what you are thinking. Always ask them how they feel, even if you think you know the answer, just to make sure. You may just be surprised. People often do things because they thought the other one wanted them to when the reality may be the opposite.” —Hyapatia Lee, author of Native Strength
Don’t hang your dirty laundry out for the neighbours to see
“Before I was a grandma we didn’t have social media so people didn’t share things about their relationship like many young people do now. But I think it’s still important not to air your dirty laundry. Don’t go running to your friends, the internet, or worst of all, your family, to vent about your latest argument. You may kiss and make up but they may not be privy to the apologies and it makes it harder for those that care to forgive. Naturally, if there is a fear of violence or the relationship is ending, this does not apply.” —Hyapatia Lee.
Don’t be an old (or young) fuddy duddy
“My grandma told me that her secret to a happy marriage was to be open to trying new things. Entering a relationship with another person necessitates becoming acclimated to their world so it is important to get out of your comfort zone and try new things. Even if you think you won’t be interested in it, that doesn’t mean that it won’t enrich your life and it will make your spouse happy. This advice has helped be open to inviting a new person into my life and creating a life together.” —Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin, a licensed clinical professional counsellor and co-founder of The Marriage Restoration Project