Reader's Digest Oct/Nov

Humour The Case Of The Missing Car I drove a short distance to the shops, parked and did my shopping. When I was done, I absent-mindedly walked home. In the morning, when I didn’t see my car outside, I assumed it had been stolen and called the police. At dinnertime, my son came in and said he’d seen the car down at the shops. Embarrassed, I called the police officer and confessed what I’d done. There was a brief silence on the other end. “This happens to other people, doesn’t it?” I said. The officer responded, “Yes, but not when they’re sober.” SUBMITTED BY ELSA PATERSON The Lies Parents Tell • Toys Us is closed when the R is backwards. • Mannequins in clothes shops are kids who didn’t behave and were taken to the shop’s ‘dungeon’, where they were turned into mannequins. • My dad told me my goldfish ran away. REDDIT.COM Nosing Around I was lying on a floaty in the pool when my three-year-old grandson climbed on top of me and had a close-up view of the hairs in my nostrils. “Grandma,” he shouted, “you have spider webs in your nose!” SUBMITTED BY NANCY TOMLIN LIFE’S LIKE THAT “Look – I only get an hour of screen time a day, so enough with the chitter-chatter.” CARTOON: SUSAN CAMILLERI KONAR/TMBI LICENCE. OPPOSITE, ILLUSTRATIONS: SHUTTERSTOCK Seeing The Funny Side rdasia.com 17