15 funny last words that are morbidly hilarious

Have you ever heard a joke so funny, you said it killed you? You’re in good company.

The 15 wisecrackers on this list are princesses and playwrights, murderers and martyrs. They span centuries and cultures, but they all share one thing: they used their dying breath to utter the funniest quotes of their lives. Like funny obituaries, the famous last words of these witty people show that death doesn’t have to kill a sense of humour.

Their funny last words prove that this is really how the world ends: not with a bang, but with some laughter.

Eighteenth-century French composer Jean-Philippe Rameau was considered one of the most influential musicians of his time – and had lofty standards to match. It was a tough assignment for a tone-deaf priest, but the resulting funny one-liner is still remembered more than 250 years later.

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This one speaks for itself. Marie Thérèse Louise was a princess and a confidant of Marie Antoinette, making these funny last words even more surprising. She was killed in the French Revolution, but not before cracking this frankly hilarious joke.

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Saint Lawrence, also known as Lawrence of Rome, delivered this cheerful quip while being burned alive. He was one of seven deacons in Rome in 258, a time of Christian persecution. His last words were such an unconventional spiritual quote that he became known as the patron saint of cooks and comedians. In religious art, he’s frequently depicted holding the gridiron he was grilled over!

Ibsen’s wife remarked that his condition was looking improved. The Norwegian playwright, best known for writing An Enemy of the People, disagreed – and with good reason, as he dropped dead shortly after.

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A priest asked Voltaire if he wanted to denounce Satan and all his works – Voltaire preferred to hedge his bets with these funny last words. The French Enlightenment philosopher was a prolific writer, including many reflective quotes about life.

“Hey, fellas! How about this for a headline for tomorrow’s paper? ‘French fries.’”

James French, a convicted murderer, had this to say to a reporter about his impending execution by electric chair. French had the classic hallmarks of a psychopath – he was charming and witty to prison guards and reporters but also committed several cold-blooded murders.

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On his way into surgery, Buddy Rich was asked by a nurse if there was anything he couldn’t take. The renowned jazz musician, widely considered one of the best drummers of his time, responded with this quip.

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Old habits die hard. Charles Gussman was an announcer and soap opera writer for radio and TV. He wrote the pilot script for Days of Our Lives and other classic TV shows. An entertainer to the end, he used his last words as a chance to share one more joke.

Life is hard when you’re funny. Del Close would know – he was a pioneer in improv, working with Second City in Chicago and as an advisor to SNL.

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