I hide photos on my computer of me petting animals at the zoo in a file named “Fireworks and vacuums” so my dog won’t find ...read more

A man walks into a seafood store carrying a trout under his arm. “Do you make fish cakes? he asked.

“Yes, we do, ...read more

A dog thinks: “The humans offer me food, love and shelter. They must be my gods.”

A cat thinks: “The humans of ...read more

When I told my wife there was a huge spider in the bath, she screamed and said, “Put it outside!”

Now I’ve go ...read more

A dog goes to the post office to send a telegram. The post office clerk says, “Well, OK. It’s five words on a line, $5 per l ...read more

A man hates his wife’s cat. He decides to load the cat off next to the road. Getting home, he finds the cat waiting for him on ...read more

A woman walked with her young child to school. When she got there, she heard the teacher whisper to another, “That child looks li ...read more

A police officer stopped at a farm and told the old farmer, “I need to inspect your farm for illegally grown drugs.”
...read more

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Philippines lockdown update:
Please be advised that due to the current lockdown in the Philippines, we hope to have the April print issue available by the middle of July, and the May, June and July issues available by the end of July, but this is dependent on when local lockdown restrictions are lifted. We sincerely apologise for this inconvenience. Thank you and stay safe!
– The Reader’s Digest team