Funny food tweets sure to make you smile

As a child, I truly did not understand how good I had it not having to decide what to eat for dinner every single night. —@jonnysun

Here are 16 hilarious lies parents told their kids.

My signature party dish is “The One I Realised I Totally Forgot to Put Out After the Guests Were Gone.” —@copymama

A girl in the coffee shop I’m working in just said to her friend, “Imagine a hot veggie smoothie,” and I’m wondering how to break it to her that soup exists. —@daynamcalpine_

There are three stages to growing up:

1) Olives are disgusting.

2) I don’t mind them.

3) Literally inhaling olives. —@Dongjirat

The worst thing about insomnia is discovering all the new hours of the day that you’re hungry. —@Asiadnyc

Here are 8 of the worst eating habits for your sleep.

I’m trying to shield my phone from onlookers because I’m embarrassed by what they might see, but it’s just slow-motion video of forks going into slices of cake. —@Originaldanksta

Discover 7 ways social media can help you lose weight.

Directions: Allow food to sit and cool for at least five minutes before eating.

Me: No. —@Abbyhasissues

Cooking tip: If you put too much water in your rice, toss a few phones in there. —@UniqueDude2

Quickly slice a block of cheese by throwing it through a harp. —@markleggett

(These cooking shortcuts, on the other hand, actually work!)

I hate cooking, but I am excited to debut my cookbook, Toast on a Paper Towel, 365 Ways. —@LizHackett