Classic bar jokes

Classic bar jokes

A man walks into a bar…or was it two men? Maybe it was a woman. However you want to tell it, there’s nothing like a bar joke to instantly liven up the room. We’ve rounded up the best of the best funny jokes to keep the banter and laughter flowing.  You’ll definitely want to add these to your repertoire. You’ll be the group comedian in no time.



The past, present, and future walk into a bar.

It was tense.

Check out these grammar memes that’ll crack you up.


Comic Sans, Helvetica, and Times New Roman walk into a bar.

“Get out!” shouts the barman. “We don’t serve your type here!”


An amnesiac walks into a bar.

He goes up to a beautiful blonde and says, “So, do I come here often?”

Here are some corny jokes everyone will laugh at.


A neutron walks into a bar.

“How much for a beer?” the neutron asks.

“For you?” says the bartender. “No charge.”


Two dragons walk into a bar.

The first one says, “It sure is hot in here.”

His friend snaps back, “Shut your mouth!”


A weasel walks into a bar.

The bartender says, “Wow, I’ve never served a weasel before. What can I get you?”

“Pop,” goes the weasel.

Not good at jokes? Here are some short jokes anyone can remember.


A sandwich walks into a bar.

The bartender says, “Sorry, sir. We don’t serve food here.”


A tennis ball walks into a bar.

The barman says, “Have you been served?”


A guy walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm.

He asks for one beer, and one for the road.

Are you numbers nerd? Check out these maths jokes.

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